When Your Job Changes, Don’t Let It Change What You Believe About Yourself

Years ago, I was told the branch I was running was closing.

Not because we weren't performing. Not because we weren't profitable. The company had decided to consolidate locations.

It was a business decision.

But it felt incredibly personal.

I had only been there nine months after being heavily recruited away from a company where I was successful and valued.

And suddenly, for the first time in my career, I wasn't in control of my next career move.

That scared me.

I had spent most of my career being sought after and recruited. When I changed jobs, it was because I decided it was time to change jobs.

This time, someone else made that decision for me.

Immediately, the insecurity set in.

OMG. What am I going to do now?

It wasn't just about finding another job.

It was my identity.

Who was I now? For the first time in my career, I was being laid off. Was I not good enough? Was I still as good as I thought I was? And who am I now that I'm changing jobs AGAIN?

Fear was starting to change the way I saw my own value.

So I sat down and wrote myself a letter.

It started:

“Dear Mandee, Self - If you are reading this, then you are probably having a bad day.”

I knew what could happen if I let fear take over. Fear could turn into insecurity. Insecurity could turn into self-doubt. And pretty soon, one business decision, completely outside of my control, could convince me that my value had changed.

So I wrote down what I knew while I could still hear myself clearly.

Have faith. Keep moving. Don't let fear define what happens next.

Most importantly, I reminded myself:

“I love myself; I respect myself, and I know I'm capable of doing anything I put my mind and energy into.”

I didn't use the word value in that letter, but looking back, that's exactly what I was reminding myself of.

My circumstances had changed. My value hadn't.

I felt beaten up. My confidence and ego had taken a hit. But somewhere underneath all of that fear, I knew my value hadn’t changed.

I wrote that letter because I thought I would need to read that letter over and over again.

Funny thing is, I never did.

Writing it was enough.

Then things moved quickly.

Before I even had time to start looking for another job, word got out that our office was closing. Before I knew it, I was getting a call for an open position that fit my background perfectly.

I hadn't applied. I hadn't sent a résumé. I hadn't even started looking for a new job yet.

It became a job and a team I absolutely loved (I miss them).

What I had been so afraid of worked out very differently than the story fear had been creating in my head.

But here's what I understand now.

Getting another job didn't give me my value back.

Because my value had never disappeared.

Which brings me to two quarters.

I recently found myself looking at two quarters that my husband has pulled out of his pocket.

One was shiny, clean and looked almost perfect.

The other looked like it had been through some shit. It was beaten up, scarred, misshapen and barely recognizable.

When he pulled out the beat-up quarter, he commented "Look how f'@$^ up this quarter is?” Then immediately added, "But guess what? It's still worth 25 cents."

That damaged quarter doesn't have to become shiny again to regain its value.

It never lost its value in the first place.

And neither do we.

A company can restructure.

A position can disappear.

Your career can take a turn you never saw coming.

But your experience, knowledge, relationships, reputation, accomplishments and everything you've learned along the way?

You take those with you.

So if life hands you a career change you didn't choose, let yourself be scared.

Just don't let fear convince you that when your circumstances change, your value changes with them.

Your job may change.

Your title may change.

Your company may change.

Your plans may completely change.

Your value doesn't.

Different condition. Same value.

Just like the quarter.

— Mandee ❤️

Mandee's Minutes

Life • Career • Leadership